I AM NEVER PRETTY ENOUGH

I will never be pretty enough.

Pretty is defined as pleasing or attractive to the eye, and if that is the definition, then I will never be enough. I will never be pretty enough. There will always be a flaw and an imperfection in what my eyes see in the mirror. I will always have the pimples and red spots on my face. My hair will never be like the perfect magazine pictures. Varicose veins and cellulite will never completely disappear. Wrinkles will happen as I age and my looks will change. I will probably never be as thin as I once was (a whole other blog post in itself one day…).

But all these things are about being pretty. They are about being pleasing to the eye. They are only about what I can see.

What about if I stopped trying to be pretty and instead tried to be beautiful?

There’s a difference between pretty and beautiful, you know. Beautiful is defined as possessing qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, think about, etc. delighting the senses or the mind. When I read this definition, I realized that being beautiful has little to do with looks and physical appearance. Beauty is not defined by what the eye can see, but rather what another person feels when they are with you.

Beautiful can include pretty, yes, but you can be beautiful without being pretty. You can also be pretty without being beautiful (think of actresses or models that are pretty to the eye but aren’t truly beautiful). Beautiful isn’t about what you can see. Beautiful is about the qualities you possess. Beautiful is grace, graciousness, kindness, giving, creative, and excellent. In essence, I don’t think that beautiful can ever be truly defined. Beautiful is undefined (hence my blog name…).

When I think of the things that I think are beautiful, I realize that I don’t find them such primarily because of how something or someone looks. I find it beautiful because of how I feel when I am in that setting or with that person. When something is beautiful, it makes me feel peaceful and happy and content. How something looks is part of the beauty, but it is not what makes it beautiful. Some of the most beautiful people that I know are not the ones that look like models or actresses. They are beautiful because of their heart and character and kindness.

It’s so easy for me to feel like I have to be pretty and perfect in order to be beautiful. But that’s a lie and it will keep me grasping for something that can never be truly attained. I want to stop chasing pretty and instead start chasing beautiful.

This doesn’t mean I just stop caring about how I look or about being pretty. I will still have fun doing makeup and hair and wearing pretty things, because that is a part of how I express my femininity. But these things do not make me beautiful or define my worth. Beautiful is found in my heart and soul, and in all that Jesus is within me. Beautiful is found in loving my husband, family, and friends well. Beautiful is found in giving and serving in whatever ways the Lord lays on my heart. Beautiful is found in the little things we do every day to spread cheer and kindness and love.

Beautiful undefined…that is you, my friend.

What about you: what are your thoughts on pretty vs. beautiful? 

I’d love to hear your thoughts!