THE ONE THING THAT KEEPS ME FROM FEELING BEAUTIFUL

Something really powerful hit me the other day.

It came out of no where, which is how my aha moments usually tend to do. I’ll be driving or walking or cleaning, just minding my own business, and bam! Aha moment. The kind of moment that feels like if I were a cartoon, I could look up and see a little lightbulb illuminated above me to show everyone that something just really made sense in my head.

My latest aha moment was this: the only thing that keeps me from feeling (not being) beautiful is…comparison.

Comparison.

COMPARISON.

It is one of the most powerful enemies of my soul. It feels so small, so inconsequential, so teensy on the grand scale of my other thoughts and attitudes…but it is a mighty foe against all that I am made to be. And I see it, and it makes me want to tattoo something like STOP COMPARING on my hand so I see it every moment of every day (i’m kidding about the tattoo…i wouldn’t actually get one), and then maybe just maybe it would be enough to change me. It’s a silly idea, because any kind of real change doesn’t come from more discipline or personal willpower. Real change has to come from the inside. It has to come from my heart, and the only One who can truly enact such a change is Jesus Christ.

Comparison is simple. The definition of compare is to look at two or more things closely in order to see what is similar or different about them, or in order to decide which one is better. Did you catch that?!

Comparison is when I look at two things and decide which one is better.

I do that. All the time.

I look at myself and I look at someone else, and decide which one is better. And most times, nearly all the time, I am the one found lacking. I’m not as creative or pretty or thin or talented or charming or friendly or nice as the one to whom I’m doing the comparing too. And while you might say it’s better to be the humble one about yourself versus being the prideful one, I’m not so sure one is less evil than the other.

Neither attitude is a giver of life and neither attitude is full of truth. I believe that Jesus came to give us life, and He does that through truth.

There is a quote by Theodore Roosevelt that sums up these thoughts perfectly: Comparison is the thief of joy. So very spot on. And I see this thief stealing from me every single day.

Comparison leaves you with only two options, and neither are life-giving. I can compare and find myself lacking, so then I try harder and do more and push push push myself into becoming better. Or I can compare and find that I’m the better one, and while I might feel a little better about myself, all I do is set up my heart to fill itself with something really ugly….pride. Comparison is a lose-lose no matter which way your heart leads you.

I find myself doing this comparison thing is even the smallest and silliest of ways, and it threatens to steal my joy all the time. I feel so done with that, and while it’s not necessarily just something you can just turn off instantly, I am ready to fight the battle for a no-comparison zone in my heart and mind and soul. Because I know that in that kind of heart there is such freedom and joy and life, and I want it.

I want to be set free to be who I am, totally. Comparison keeps me in a box…it keeps me creating myself out of who others are. Others are awesome and vital and an incredible blessing…but they are others, not me. Each of us have been given a specific body and specific life and a specific soul that is different than others. It is meant to be different. You are meant to be you.

Don’t let the comparison to someone else keep you from finding the unending joy and life and freedom in being you.

What about you: how do you find comparison stealing from you? How do you fight the battle against comparison?

I’d love to hear your thoughts!